Pads and Ends

The Supreme Idiocy That Is "FML"

2010-09-03T01:27:00.000-07:00

You wanna know what I really can't stand? Sure you do; you wouldn't be here if you didn't. I thoroughly loathe when people use "FML". You'll notice that it's always used after something that is, in the big picture, incredibly trivial.
"OMG; I have to write this paper tonight. FML" Seriously? Fuck your life because you have to- nay, get to- do an assignment as a part of something that is bettering your life and will open up opportunities that others will never have? Really?
"I have to get up and go to work. FML" You know how many people would do nearly anything to have that job, you spoiled little brat? Yeah, fuck your life because you have a means to pay for food and shelter. Poor thing.
This world is full of people with legitimate reasons for despair. There are millions of homeless people, those dying an AIDS related death and addicts who are compelled beyond their own power to do the one thing they hate above all others day in and day out. I could understand it if these people said "fuck my life". But not you.
Later this morning, my aunt is going in to get a mastectomy. Do you know what that is? That's when they cut off your cancerous breast. She already has no hair or energy- you know how many times she's said "fuck my life"? Zero. That's because she's an adult and she has perspective. She has a life and knows it's a precious thing.
Maybe people just don't think about these sorts of things before they start being crybabies and showing off their disgusting sense of entitlement. Maybe they don't care. But I do know that every time I see or hear "FML" I think "Yeah, fuck your life. Seriously. Fuck you."

The Old Man And The Punk

2009-08-20T06:59:00.000-07:00

Living in West Virginia, the vast majority of strangers I encounter regard me with great disdain. They take one look at me and decide I'm the scum of the earth. For this reason, I make it a point, when in public, to conduct myself with the utmost kindness and politeness so that maybe the next time they see some guy with blue hair, a bunch of tattoos or anything else of the sort they might think twice before writing them off. That, and it's just the right thing to do; pausing a moment to hold a door for someone or picking up something they dropped only takes a second or two of my time but it could make the difference between them having a good day or a crappy one- it really is all about the small things. About an hour or so ago I walked to the store to get a coffee and spotted an elderly man struggling to change his tire. As I approached him he snapped "I don't have any change!" "No, sir," I replied, "I was wondering if you could use a little help with that." He eyed me suspiciously before muttering "alright" and I commenced to make quick work of what would have been quite arduous for him. After I finished, he offered to pay me and I declined- this really caught him off guard. "You know, buddy, I had you wrong" he said and we shook greasy hands. It felt very satisfying not only to help somebody out but also to hopefully put a dent in decades of prejudice.

Blanks Walks Off And So Do I

2009-08-19T07:06:00.000-07:00

My favorite moment of this season so far is still Li'l Tony's pinch-hit walk and subsequent winning run on the day we acquired him (all of which happened while I was on mushrooms, I should probably add), but each of the past two games are definitely in the top-five. I watched Blanksy's walkoff job Monday night on the front porch since I was out there smoking when the rally started and I wasn't about to get out of my seat and eff it up. When KB parked that ball out in left, I went friggin' nuts; there's a good possibility I may have woke a neighbor or two up. One neighbor who was still awake without my assistance shouted across the street "What you wilin' out about, nigga?" so I tossed my computer inside and went over there to explain myself and do a little socializing. This, my friends, is where it gets really bizarre. A few neighbors and some skanktastic girl I'd never seen before were holding it down, doing pretty much the same thing as me at that point which was drinking crappy beer. So far, not weird at all. Then he starts telling me how he's gonna start a strip club/ brothel out of his house "but only on the weekends" to which another neighbor responded that "nah, you neeed to have them hoes up in here on a Sunday cuz that's when my old lady's out of town". He then asked the skanky girl to "let me see how you do" and she queried "You got any bills?" His response was "No, but I got some pills" and without even asking what kind of pills they were, she immediately began walking inside. I was speechless and disgusted although not one bit surprised. I remained outside, talking to my next-door neighbor who is surprisingly a semi-decent human being- surprisingly because of the company he keeps- and getting hammered. And by hammered, I mean full-on Drama goes to DC hammered. Not too much later- or hell, maybe a lot later for all I know- pimp guy calls up another skankariffic girl with the intentof her and the other one "putting on a show". As soon as she got there and it was clear that everyone was going inside to participate in the degrading of women, I excused myself. I was then asked "What, you gay, nigga?" Since there's no point in explaining my stance to someone who's enthusiastic about exploiting human beings and treating women like a combination of product and garbage, I just said I was tired. All in all, it was pretty effed up and I know where I'm not gonna be hanging out ever again.

P'n'E Book Review: "The Code" Is A Load

2009-08-16T18:15:00.000-07:00

Dear God, what a horrible book. This steaming pile is proof positive that you can get anything published as long as you know the right people. The premise of the book is baseball's unwritten "code" as far as retaliation, brushbacks, respect, hard slides, so on and so forth. Good idea, terrible execution. The "author" of this excuse for literature simply cobbled together quotes from a few current and a lot of former players, the vast majority of which were Minnesota Twins. What you wind up with is a million variations of "yeah, sometimes you gotta drill a guy- but you never go for his head". It's broken down into chapters including Excessive Celebration, Showing Up Hitters, Sliding Hard, et cetera yet every subject concludes with "if somebody does that, you gotta drill him- but you never go for his head". I always wished they'd make a book version of "Groundhog Day", now I realize they did. Jeez. Another thing about this hardbound colostomy bag that really grinds my gears is the insistence to awkwardly tack the phrase "the code" into nearly every insipid quote. I could go on and on about every shortcoming this literary equivilant of herpes has but I really don't want to think about it anymore.

For one moment last night, everything was perfect.

2009-07-13T15:40:00.000-07:00

I never remember my dreams. Never.

This one was different. When I woke up today, every vivid detail was painted on my brain. I feel it's my duty to warn you that what you're about to read is one of the cheesiest, most insipid loads of misty-eyed garbage you'll ever waste your time reading. I'm not even sure why I'm documenting this because to do so is to surely invite derision and good-natured ridicule but I feel strangely compelled. That being said, it's time I set the scene.

I can still smell the air. An ocean breeze brushed wafts of beer and garlic fries past our faces, a smell I've encountered only at PETCO Park. I was sitting next to a beautiful young gal I know, one who in reality is mercifully oblivious to the slight-but-none-the-less-pathetic silly schoolboy crush I vaguely harbor; our seats were a couple rows behind the first base dugout, close enough to see Li'l T's smile in the on-deck circle before he strode to the plate. I don't know who we were playing or who was on base. I do know that when TGJ dropped the first pitch into shallow left-center, somebody scored and the place went nuts- except for two people. We sat there calmly as Buck-O-Nine blared from the PA, the most genuine smile across each of our faces and clicked the necks of our Dos Equis bottles against the other's. End scene.

I'm certainly no psychologist so I don't know what to make of it. It was simply to me a respite from a world where the Padres always lose and I'm like a fourteen year old for someone way outta my league. For one moment, life was perfect... and I'm just happy I got that one moment, no matter how unreal it really is.

Know Your Enemy: Colorado Rockies Edition

2008-04-14T01:04:00.000-07:00

I've come to rely on the fact that every single day, when I finally roll off the couch in the afternoon, I'll be greeted by a bright, shiny, brand-spankin' new volume of the world-renowned "SLPiH", which Winfields Ghost and Drama do such a spectacular job of researching while never missing a deadline. I thought, "hey, why should they get to have all of the fun?" so I decided I'd break out my very own regular feature, a little something I like to call "Know Your Enemy", which is basically exactly what it sounds like- a roundup of pertinent links about our upcoming opponents. While occasionally giving respect where respect is due and relevant statistical analysis and breakdown, I can only imagine that it will consist mostly of ridicule and derision of the d-bags that play for other teams. Let's give it a go, shall we?

We kick off our three game series vs. the reigning N.L. champion Colorado Rockies at the greatest park around at precisely 7:05 pm PST Tuesday, the same time as Wednesday and Thursday's games.

Much like we did, Colorado just concluded a road series against a hated division rival with a win one day after recieving a brutal thrashing. Doing most of the damage were Clint Barmes (subbing for the slumping Troy Tulowitzki), who homered and drove in four, and Matt Holliday and Garrett Atkins, who each went yard and drove in three.

Ubaldo Jimenez will be going up against The Wolf. Jimenez won his last start against Atlanta, giving up three earned over six in a 4-3 nailbiter at Coors. He wasn't as successful his first time out, earning the loss in St. Louis, giving up three earned in five innings of work, a game in which "super-sub" Jeff Baker got his only hit thusfar in eleven AB/PAs. Baker is 3-for-18 with 7 Ks in seven career games versus the Padres.

San Diego native Mark Redman gets the nod for Wednesday's game, going up against Justino Hermano. Like Jimenez, Redman beat the Braves in Colorado his last time out, giving up three runs (two earned)on seven hits in five innings of work after getting knocked around for a loss in his first start of the season, giving up five runs (four earned) on nine hits and three walks in less than six innings against the reviled D-Bags. Also like Jimenez (1-0 in two starts), Redman hasn't faced the Padres much, losing his only decision of four games (three starts).

Thursday's finale matches Jeff Francis against ~~Philip Rivers~~ Jake Peavy. Francis is currently 0-2 after getting rocked in both of his starts against Arizona after getting a rain reprieve from his first horrendous start against the Cardinals. In 16 career starts against the Padres, Francis has been far from successful, wearing a 4-10 record and an ERA of 5.83. Khalil, Kouz, and Bard have had their way with him. Not so much Jim Ed, though (1-for-12; ouch!).

Don't feel bad, Corey, this guy's mailbag gets filled with some pretty insipid questions, too. What kind of idiot with the entire internets at his disposal asks what happened to a free agent? Two clicks and you can realize for yourself that not only is Kazuo Matsui a member of the Astros now, but also that he has been unable to play due to anal fissures for quite some time now. Jesus, people; give the Brocks and Rencks of the world some credit and wait until you have a legitimate question.

Colorado is currently 14th in the N.L. in BA (Padres are 2nd), 15th in hits (we're #1!), and 14th in runs and RBI (15th!). Maybe if we watch them closely, we'll pick up a few tips on how to not leave 'em stranded...

Well, I hope you guys learned something about the state of our adversary. Have a great day and don't do anything I wouldn't do. Later...

Trevor's Still Alive (but don't ask ESPN)

2008-04-03T22:58:00.000-07:00

[This entry is a verbatim copy-and-paste of a diary, er, I mean fanpost I put up over at the almighty Gaslamp Ball. My BAC is elevated enough to merit this its very own PnE spot- like anyone's gonna notice.]

All day yesterday, the only thing I heard on both ESPN and Fox Sports was the same tired shid about Trevor needing to retire or be demoted. Today he tosses a perfect fuggin' inning and not a word is to be heard. I don't understand the rabid minds that demand this sort of knee-jerk sensationalism. In today's media the only triumphs that are documented are the ones that have a nice, even number attached... or happen in New York or even farther north. It's the same old bitchfest that we have all been crying for years but I just needed to vent on the unadulterated absurdity of a time-old quandry.

'08 in the N.L.

2008-03-18T21:42:00.001-07:00

N.L. East
1. NY Meth
2. Illadelphia Phallus
3. Atlanta Racists
4. Washington Generals
5. Florida Firesales
This division is the most cut-and-dry. Santana will come in third in the Cy Young voting to the one-two punch that is Jake Peavy and Chris Young.

N.L. Central
1. NorthSide #1 Threats
2. Cincinnati Style Chili
3. Milwaukee Favre-Missers
4. St. Louis El Caminos
5. Houston Padre Offcasts
6. Piss-burgh Bream-Haters
I’m going out on a limb by picking Cincy to finish second but I stand by it.

N.L. West
1. SDMFPs
2. Arid-zona D-Bags
3. Filthy Fuckin’ Dodgers
4. Denver Luckies
5. The Bottom of the Bay
Good pitching beats good hitting. Luckily, the Pads have great pitching and everyone else in the division has good hitting at best. This year they have an offense that can actually score a few runs per game and that’s all it’ll take. World Fuckin’ Champions!

Bring on your best arguments. The A.L. edition will follow soon enough.

Scott Rad

2008-03-05T20:02:00.000-08:00

Maybe I came off a bit cold in my assessment of Scott Speizio the other day. I'm not trying to bury him; I've always liked the guy, what with him being in a metal band and having the blood red soul patch/ wisdom patch/ ball tickler/ whatever they're calling it these days thingie. The Qualified Substance Abuse Professional in me is sure he can get his shit together. Maybe we'll need a stretch-run utilityman and he can dye his gine-duster navy blue... Anyway, writing about him made me think I should write something about the greatest ballplayer/ musician/ skater/ entrepreneur of all time, Scott Mo'fuggin Radinsky.

Nevermind that he was a filthy Dodger for a few years, dude's a badass. Not only has he pitched in more Major League games than any other Jewish man, kicked cancer's ass, founded a landmark skatepark and museum, he's the lead singer of Pulley- one of the finest pop-punk bands in all of the lands. Breathe in the goodness:

Spring Training

2008-03-02T20:34:00.000-08:00

Its been long overdue and after a long hiatus I am back and ready to talk padres baseball, so lets get to it. As everyone knows spring training is a good time for pitchers to refine their stuff and hitters to get a look at live pitching.
There are three particular battles that I am looking forward to see how they shake out. First is how many rule 5 draftees will make the roster. I think that all of them have a chance to make the squad so it will be interesting to see them battle for open spots.
The second thing that I am eager to see is who will win the 5th starter position. There is a grip of guys vying for the last starting pitching spot and I believe that it will be Germano until Prior is ready to come back, but I hope it is one of our younger guys Leblanc, Inman or Geer just to see how they can do against major league hitters.
Lastly, Hairston vs. Headley. Ultimately I think that Headley will just do too much in spring training to sit on the bench its nothing that Hairston will do wrong its just Headley is the real deal and his bat will not allow him to be sat or platooned in left.
Here is to the battles of spring training.

The Textbook Definition of Irony

2008-02-27T19:16:00.000-08:00

Scott Spiezio got released by the Cardinals today as the result of an incident last December in which he got hammered, crashed his Beemer, fled the scene and topped it all off with beating the hell out of his neighbor. Obviously, that's no good and thank goodness he didn't kill anyone. But here's the part that got me:

Asked about Spiezio’s release, Cardinals manager Tony La Russa said, “I think it’s a consistent message about what the team represents.”

Saaaay Whaaaaat?!?! Tony probably would have kicked his neighbor's ass if he could have managed to stay awake. I guess they're required to finally take the hard-line approach after TLR's escapade and what happened to Josh Hancock, but the last thing I'd expect to hear it called would be "a consistent message about what the team represents", especially coming from the lips of a man who got to keep his job under such circumstances.

Bonds To Another Bay? Good.

2008-02-26T19:46:00.000-08:00

Lately, with all of the decent players snatched up, people have been left to speculate where Barry Bonds is going to work this year. Word around the campfire has him going to Tampa Bay- much to my delight. It's the best case scenario. His "legacy" would be tainted even worse than it already is, what with his 3000th hit coming up guaranteeing that history won't be able to forget that he went out with the only pathetic team that would have him. This would be even better than him retiring or playing in Japan because in either of those instances he can play the "Feel sorry for me; I got blackballed" card. If the no longer devilish Rays pick him up, there will be one happy guy in West Virginia reveling in watching him struggle through one last, pointless season. I heard some idiot on the ESPNs saying that signing Bonds would automatically turn the Rays into a contender. It makes perfect sense because that's what he's been doing for the Giants, right? Right? Where do they find these people?

The Kinda Bad and The Very Good

2008-02-12T19:51:00.000-08:00

First off, I'd like to apologize to our readers (both of you!) for the long hiatus. I've had a lot of irons in the ol' fire and thepadfather hasn't wanted anything to do with sports in general since- well, you know... Anyway, here's what I was gonna say:

Our plans were set. This summer was definitely the summer that we were gonna pack it all up, kiss this hellhole goodbye, and take up residence in San Diego County. This was still the official plan until last Saturday- at which time an old acquaintance of mine offered me the vacant room in the tattoo shop he co-owns. Oh fuck yeah! This opportunity is the culmination of every bit of dreaming I've done since I was five years old. The plan has now been revised to bump the move back a year until I'm at the next level and fully established. I never thought I'd be so stoked to not be moving to San Diego. Life is good...

ESPN Classic is garbage and here's why...

2008-01-27T19:28:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, Suddenlink rearranged some of the channels and I was uber-stoked to find out that now we get ESPN Classic. My joy was about to go straight down the toilet in a hurry. It had been some time since I'd had Classic and, dear God, the years have not been kind. Why the hell don't they just call it The Poker Channel? Seriously, I enjoy taking everybody's money at the poker table just as much as the next guy, but when it comes to watching it on TV, fuck that shit straight up and down. When they're not airing that shite or Arliss, the actual classic sporting events they do manage to wedge in are season-specific. Right now, all they're showing is basketball since football season is (practically) over. Maybe it's just me, but it seems like it would make much more sense to air sports in their off-season. By doing what they do, Disney forces its various arms of ESPN to compete against one another in an all-or-nothing proposition. If somebody's a college basketball fan, they'd be a lot more likely to watch a classic game if it wasn't up opposite a live basketball game. Being a baseball junkie, right now is when I jones most to see some baseball, but by the time they get around to airing classic baseball, I'll have real games to watch. It's not rocket surgery, people; give your consumers what they want when they most need it. Then again, what should I expect from a company that relies on Eduardo Perez for intelligent analysis?

I can see why you miss this guy...

2008-01-20T22:37:00.000-08:00

Bip was basically Joey Cora with an ego problem. Look at those fuckin' wristbands; why not just get two from Hot Topic that say "I ♥ Me"? That's a good case for Paul Lukas: the rise and fall of the portrait wristbands. Only a select few players like Bip, Bonds, Sheff and Piazza had them for only a couple of years in the early-mid nineties, but they disappeared just as quickly as they arrived. With the technological advances, imagine how awesome they could make a wristband these days. Nike would have to invest in orange thread solely for the purpose of rendering Brian Giles's face... Anyways, here's the Bip card:

picks

2008-01-19T20:32:00.000-08:00

New York vs. Green Bay
Green Bay 28-17
San Diego vs. New England
Brain says 31-21 N.E
Heart says 27-24 S.D

It's tomorrow now...

2008-01-19T00:06:00.000-08:00

Now that you mention it, I’ve got a card of the last real outfielder K.T. swiped out of someone’s back pocket; it’s an old-school jim-dandy of Jimmy Ballgame. Heck yeah, I’m calling him Jimmy Ballgame; it’s been too long that’d I’ve had to admire him from afar. Worst case scenario, I feel privileged to see a legend in his twilight- like Mets fans in ’73 or Brewers fans in ’76. Personally, I think he’s still got enough of his historic range and glovework as well as sufficient offensive prowess for two more productive seasons. At any rate, here’s the card:

One, that’s one of the fugliest got-dang unis I’ve seen in my short, miserable life. Two, Jimmy Ballgame doesn't sound badass enough… let’s brainstorm this… J-Ed… Jim Ed… Jimmy Ed… Jimmy Edge- yeah! From now on, James Patrick Edmonds will always be Jimmy Edge to me. Yep; that’s all it takes…

Slow news day...

2008-01-18T22:39:00.000-08:00

...so here's an old baseball card I found of our fearless leader in his 'stache rockin' days:

...and, yeah, I'm definitely gonna milk these baseball cards as time-and-spacefillers whenever there's nothing noteworthy to type about. A new card goes up each day K.T. doesn't get us another real outfielder and probably that day too, if I've got one of him. And to answer your second question, thepadfather, yes. Yes, there are Bip Roberts cards.

Got any corner outfielders?

2008-01-16T22:29:00.001-08:00

That's what K.T. wants. The fact that we need another real outfielder isn't newsworthy at all, but it's good to know that he's acknowledging the problem- going as far as to conclude the chat with "I now need to go find a corner outfielder for you all." The rest was classic non-answers to fairly basic questions. A platoon of Bard and Barrett? Ugh. I hope somebody out there takes Barrett and some Triple-A arms off our hands for an outfielder. The Pirates still seem like the most logical candidate for that sort of deal...

Playoff Predictions part deux

2008-01-11T20:55:00.000-08:00

Last week I went 3-1 and am hoping to go 3-1 this weekend.
Seattle vs. Green bay
I think this will be a close game but in the end the Pack will take this one 27-24.
Jacksonville vs. New England
I do not think that this game will be as good as most as I think the Pats will blow them out 38-17.
New York vs. Dallas
I for one do still not believe in Eli and think this Romo ordeal is beyond ridiculous. Boys 35-28.
San Diego vs. Indy
I think that people are underestimating the fact that San Diego owns Indy for some odd reason. Just like people doubted that the Warriors would beat the Mavs. Ultimately i think the Boltz win and win 27-24

The '84 Series...

2008-01-09T20:50:00.000-08:00

Friend of the family, Tigers fan, and all-around good guy Joe let me borrow his DVD of the '84 WS the other day. It started off with a rundown of each League Championship Series- that was infinitely more palatable than 80% of the World Series. It was really cool to see both of this year's Hall of Famers putting their best out there on the grandest stage of all. I think that Gibson HR off of Goose to seal the deal really summed up who Goose was. It's such an iconic moment, from the impromptu mound conference with a laid back Dick Williams realizing "You mean you're talking about striking him out" to an incredulous Sparky Anderson telling Gibson "He don't wanna walk you! He don't wanna walk you!" And that's the thing; Goose didn't play it safe- ever. He was balls-out, confident, all-or-nothing all the time. That moment also illustrated what made Dick Williams so great; he believed in his players and valued their insights and knowledge. It backfired for both of them that particular time, but at least they both stuck with their guns. If either of them even knew the definition of playing by the book, they would have never made it as far as they did...

About time...

2008-01-08T22:28:00.000-08:00

Congratulations, Goose.

My playoff predictions

2008-01-04T18:19:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow starts the first day of the NFL playoffs. Here are my predictions for the first round.
Washington vs. Seattle-
I see the Seahawks winning this one 27-24. Even though the Redskins have played well down the stretch and will play inspired football I think that the Seahawks playing at home will squeak this one out.
Jacksonville vs. Pittsburgh-
This matchup is the most difficult to choose as i think it is a toss up. Ultimately i think that the Jaguars will pull this one out 28-21. Big Ben gets sacked once every 14 attempted passes, and i think they will have to throw with Willie Parker out. Plus David Garrard doesn't turn it over and that will be the difference.
New York vs. Tampa Bay-
I think that the Bucs will win this one 21-17. Eli is a mental midget and never plays well in big games. The Bucs d will do all the work and Garcia will do enough not to screw it up.
Tennessee vs. San Diego-
I think that the Chargers will win this one 35-17 but i am worried that if the Titans can stick around til the 4th quarter that Vince Young will pull something out of his ass.
It should be fun.

Moves and more...

2008-01-03T16:17:00.000-08:00

Former Friar flop and pre-Prior potential Padres pitching possibility Matt Clement signed with the Cardinals today. Above all, I'll always remember him as the guy on the receiving end of the greatest at bat ever...

The White Sox snagged up Nick Swisher. I'm a fan of the guy by default; he played his high school games about half a mile from my house- that's a big deal out here in Whitetrashville, Nowhereland...

The Mountaineers did exactly what Pat White requested. I'm pretty happy about it; people from other places don't understand how important the fact that he's a West Virginia guy is. I know my brother's stoked; last night he wrote this directly after the game:
interview------- Passed!!!
Bill Stewart- great, great. Lets try and get Calvin Magee, our offensive coordinator to stay. Seriously, it's the best i have felt in a long time; just a really good feeling. i mean a great domination from start to finish. Our and i do mean "Our" defense just Played Awesome! best the best nobody i mean yeah try and play better than them. Now i have to mention OU's offense- all i have to say is dirty. trying to compensate, HOLDING???? you ever heard of that? man. just can't keep up? Anyways, West Virginia Offense was just intelligently explosive. Schimtt: I love this guy. sweet shit, i enjoyed myself. done, drinking beer, watching sport center. ~P-DUB!
I couldn't have said it better, Paul. My favorite part of the whole evening was the interview with Schmitt at the end of the game.

Speaking of the WVU game, it was great to hear Matt Vasgersian again...

WVU

2008-01-01T21:24:00.000-08:00

I know that this is suppose to be a padre blog but oh well we named it pads and ends for a reason. Anyway I am pumped about the West Virginia/Oklahoma Fiesta bowl match up tomorrow night. I really hope that WVU can shock some people and win another big bowl game. The way I feel for Rich Rodriguez is the same way i feel for Nick Saban d-bags. I hope that Steve Slaton can find his way back into the powerful WVU rushing attack. The past two games he has rushed the ball 19 times for 65 yards. Are you kidding me???? Slaton is possibly one of the 5 best running backs in college right now (D-Mac, Hart, Smith, Slaton, and Rice with the Freshman from Geogria right in the mix). In order for WV to win the game I think that Slaton is going to have to have a monster game. Noel Devine and Owen Schmitt and Pat White will all need to have big games in the rushing department. Along with a solid rushing attack which will be hard against the Sooner defense White will have to throw the ball effectively. He has plenty of viable options and even a few playmakers on the outside. Darius Reynaud and Dorrell Jalloh must play big both in the passing and rushing game.

Defensively they must stop the passing attack that the Sooners have. Bradford is a very good quaterback and might even be a force at the next level. They also have a couple of receivers in Malcolm Kelly Juaquin Iglesias and Jermaine Gresham. I am not so much concerned in the rushing game of the Sooners since the loss of AP to the NFL has left them without a 1000 yard rusher on the season.

Ultimately, i think that the Sooners might be too much for the Mountaineers but I will still be cheering my heart out.

LEEEETTTTTSSSS GO MOUNTAINEERS!

Dead Flowers...

2007-12-31T00:47:00.000-08:00

With the mention of the almighty Guns 'n' Fuckin' Roses over at GLB; I thought I'd point out that Mike Ness and Axl Rose both bit off the same Rolling Stones song to create respective classics. Compare the intro to "Used To Love Her" and the entire chord progression of "Ball and Chain"... Oddly enough, Ness ridicules G'n'R onstage as part of his between-song banter on 2004's Live In Orange County while his drummer Charlie Quintana looks on from a few feet away- this being the same Charlie Quintana who played in G'n'R side-band Izzy Stradlin and the JuJu Hounds...

Whatnot...

2007-12-29T23:24:00.000-08:00

The shitty thing about sports is that sometimes you have to root for teams and people you hate. Case in point, I need the better Manning and his gang of Colts to beat Tennessee tomorrow so the Browns can get in...

Here's something semi- Padres related that I drew up for my friends' bands:

The Chargers game should be nice. I especially hate the Raiders, so it'll be nice to see them get their shit pushed in... For coherent analysis, why not head on over to J-Dub's Boltz 4 Eva? There's good stuff goin' down over there...

Smug? Check. Millionaire? Check. Notorious for being a swinger off the field? Perhaps the biggest check until yesterday. Yep, Jim "King" Leyritz is a real lady-killer. Dex over at GLB summed it up better than I could...

Go buy some Fugazi records and burn everything else you own...

Pads and Pats

2007-12-29T14:05:00.000-08:00

I don't know about most people but I am still not completely satisfied about what we did the off-season. I really hope that KT is not done and pulls out a trade, either for a corner outfielder or center fielder, before spring training.
Is it me or is anyone else worried that Brian Giles isn't going to be ready for opening day?
Anyone heard what Aki is looking for? I wouldn't mind having him back in the bullpen one bit if the cost was right. I think him, Tatch, and Merrideth would be an unbelievable tandem in the pen.
I really hope Headley gets his fair shot to start out the year. I really do not want him on the big league roster if he isn't going to get a significant number of at bats. Either play him in left and give the everyday job or keep him in AAA and let him start at third.
Reiterating how happy I am about the Prior signing. I am glad he wanted to come back and play at home and I think his deal is best for both him and the Padres although I wish there was a team option for 09.
All in all I'm excited for the season to start and can't wait to see how things play themselves out in spring training.

In non-padre news. I hate the Patriots. I always have, there is just something so smug about Tom Brady and Bill Billicheat. I hate how he can go up to Anthony Smith and start barking in his face and everyone says what a great leader he is yet Phillip Rivers gets called whiny when he talks shit. I have never rooted for a New York team in my life, not to mention Eli Manning is one of my least favorite players in the NFL but tonight it will be like I am rooting for the Boltz or Pads. Is it the smartest thing to do for the Giants to not rest their starters? NO. Would i start them knowing i can't improve/lower my playoff spot? in most cases no i wouldn't but we are talking about an undefeated season and i commend Coughlin in his desire to win. Good for him. Go Giants. STP. screw the patriots.

I'm done have a good weekend.

More ellipsis...

2007-12-27T21:35:00.000-08:00

...I'm a big fan of ellipsis (...); they're the perfect transition when you don't feel like working up a witty or relevant transition. My friend Tessa pointed out to me that ellipsis are supposed to have a space between each period and I can see where that makes sense- ellipsis imply something unsaid, so perhaps each space is meant to represent a sentence punctuated by the following period. I really have no idea but I just type it without the spaces because I'm lazy...

...I mentioned to my brother last night while we were watching SportsCenter that I don't like the Mavericks or basketball at all but I still think these jerseys are about as awesome as they get...

...Social D's been playing a new song live recently. It's called "Can't Take It With You"- it's pretty bitchin'. The first time I heard it, it reminded me of my Christ-lover* of a mother who always used that as her excuse for never spending money...

...*not that there's anything wrong with that...

...That Wednesday night Purdue/ Central Michigan Motor City Bowl game turned from a first half blowout (we were watching other shit most of the time because it was so lopsided) into a badass nailbiter. I was paying particular attention since CMU's Head Coach Butch Jones, a former WVU assistant, is the leading candidate to take over for Rich "Supervising Bagger at the Douche Factory" Rodriguez at the helm of the mighty Mountaineers foosball program. I was impressed with his ballsy management as he guided his students from a twenty one point deficit to a tie. I also like that Dan LeFevour is a poor man's Pat White and has flourished under Jones...

...I read a pretty nifty article about 2007's retirees over at the Worldwide Leader. I especially liked Paul Lukas's blurb; I could really relate. I remember feeling old realizing that guys younger than me were succeeding as Major Leaguers when "K-Rod" was lighting Giants up for the Angels in the 2002 World Series... Now I know I'm old when my stepdaughter makes jokes about me having a pet dinosaur as a child...

...I guess that's about enough for now...

Thus ends the wait...

2007-12-26T13:50:00.000-08:00

What can I say about the Mark Prior signing that hasn't already been said by everybody else while I was still asleep? Extremely low risk (a million bucks), extremely high potential for reward. I hate the word "potential"; I always have. I've always had it stuck to me and I've always interpreted it to mean "you could suck less but right now you're a piece of shit". I bet Mark Prior's sick of it too...

I hope everybody that celebrates Christmas had a merry one and that everyone who doesn't had a bitchin' Tuesday nonetheless. Anybody get anything awesome? I know that thepadfather got a couple of rad hats- speaking of whom, I figured he woulda blogged up a storm by now. Maybe I should call him up and twist his arm to bust out some in-depth analysis of the Prior pickup or something...

West Virginia pride:

2007-12-24T02:03:00.000-08:00

Tonight I popped my big little brother's tattoo cherry. Here's what we came up with:

Ellipsis...

2007-12-23T11:41:00.000-08:00

What an absolutely brutal game if you're a Browns fan. I can only imagine how distraught my brother-in-law is right now and frankly, I'm glad this is the one Sunday I'm not watching the game over at their house- I'm sure it's an absolute funeral scene. It also makes me glad I'm not a die-hard football fan. I dwell on Padres losses until they win and I can't imagine waiting a week or even two weeks for the first shot at redemption. I mean, I get pissed when the Mountaineers lose but it doesn't stay with me. Now, the Rich Rodriguez thing? Yeah, I'll hold onto that 'til the day I die. I was telling jbro12 the other day that I've always hated Ohio State more than any other program but now I hope they kick the shit out of their arch-nemesis Michigan in every sport, every time out... As you probably noticed, the poll is readable now. I'll count that as my one accomplishment for the day. For the record, it allows multiple answers... SHIT! INTERCEPTED IN THE END ZONE?!?! What the hell is wrong with Derek Anderson? This is just getting worse and worse... Finally, Happy Festivus to everybody. Go gather your loved ones for the airing of grievances...

Just what the world needed...

2007-12-22T12:57:00.000-08:00

If I were saying that out loud, you'd sense the sarcasm. The world doesn't need another Padres blog; we've already got Gaslamp Ball. This is my attempt at something a little different; a bit more self-centered and definately less focused. This is intended more as a "what's on my mind right now" kind of thing rather than being tailored toward one particular audience- i.e.: if you're a Padres fan, you might have to sift through some crap you don't care about. I guess I just wanted to create a place where just about anything can be said without fear of irrelevance. Have at it in the comments department; I welcome open debate and don't mind (wait, strike that, encourage) any sort of obscenity and off-the-wall lunacy...